How did I begin to study The Sutra on Longevity(1)----LingXi (one of Zhenlin’s disciples)

I did not go to work because of illness, so sometimes I went internetting at home.
(After giving birth to my daughter, I canceled the cable TV to keep my daughter from the dangers of television . Until now, seven years of no television, there is an advantage that the girl is not interested in watching TV like other children.) With the help of my online patient friend, I set up my Sina Blog(http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1251256804) and joined the blog circle of cancer patients. Some of them are Buddhists. Maybe I have a good nature, believing each word they said.

A lot of Buddhist sites were found through the Baidu . Hence I did a home study of the Great Dharani, the Heart Sutra and the Diamond Sutra.

After that I began to chant the Surangama Mantra. But it’s too long for me . I have to listen to it online. Almost eight months later, I automatically became a vegetarian. It was so amazing. (To be a Vegetarian is the best thing I have done in my life, I think)

I also applied for the QQ. I did not remember who told me the Shanxi Xiaoyuan（the Small Hospital in Shanxi Province）,which is a video about Buddhism treatment stories in Shanxi Province.) I really appreciated her. I watched all the stories of the Shanxi Xiaoyuan online, then I began to learn The Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva Sutra and particularly like to watch the Master Chin Kung preaching statement online. More and more love for Buddhism, more and more confessional for the mistakes I had made.

However, my disease is getting worse and worse. I do chemotherapy every year, but it is serious year by year. I had done chemotherapy 10 times in 3 years, which made me disheartened. I couldn’t bear the pain any more in the chemotherapy and it made me so desperate that I often had the mind to die this year. I prayed before the figure of Buddha. I did not want keep my future life . Let me reborn as soon as possible! No matter how sick I was of the kind of deterioration, I never lose the confidence of the Buddha. Without Buddhist, I must have been worse.

This year I often visited http://www.shxxy.cn/ to get information about Shanxi Xiaoyuan . I also read The Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva Sutra every day and worshiped the Buddha more than ever. Later I found the lion's blog who is a girl in Hong Kong ( http://hk.myblog.yahoo.com/lion-booboo ). With a Venable Mater ,She is a Buddhist having a deva-eye, followed by a guardian divinity called Big Eye Cock. I asked her for help and she answered my questions hot-heartedly .She told me to keep reading The Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva Sutra and worshipping the Buddha. In addition, I have to set a large number livings free every day, regardless of how many. I also listened to the the Mahamayuri Vidyarajni Mantra when I was free. It made me feel better to set livings free every day. I was going to give up chemotherapy because my body didn’t turn a little better for it. Instead I was eager to do the 7-days Buddha-work in Shanxi Xiaoyuan.

Lion advised me to take the treatment in the hospital while setting livings free. Therefore, I did another chemotherapy .

After this chemotherapy, my face was swollen at the eighth day. The turgescence used to appear on the third day after a chemotherapy. Now doctors have no way to cure my cancer and just told me to believe in miracles.( God, what the doctor said really made me crazy!)My family did not believe in Buddhism. They just sent me to take chemotherapy, chemotherapy, and chemotherapy, which made me terribly depressed.